I can’t cope

[Captain24]

Oh the poor thing @tyme. I hope you can help her through it. At least she has support and recognition. 

Tomorrow’s job list… pet shopping!! 😜 

Are you going to train as a therapy dog? 

She is a little bit cute. she will grow on you but I know your concerns around pets. That was my first thought. 

[tyme]

I know she will grow on me, and hence I'm not holding her lol @Captain24 . She's at my feet at the moment. 

My sister has gone out now to get a few pet things because no one was expecting to have a puppy here with us. We have NOTHING....

[tyme]

Guess what... the dog is on my lap right now...sleeping... @Captain24 

Oh no.

[Captain24]

You’re so cute @tyme. She hasn’t even been there 2 hours! 

Does she have a name? 

Are you at your place or your sisters? Are the kids hanging around with the pup? 

Sorry for a million questions.  I have chest pain, feel sick and have intense thoughts. 

[tyme]

No worries for the questions. I'm still getting over the fact that there's a dog...

I'm at my sisters'. @Captain24 

I'm sitting on the dining table while they play around.

Continue to practice deep breathing. It can take some of these flight/fight response away.

[Captain24]

You’ll be grateful for your own place tonight when you are sleeping and don’t have to listen to the pup! @tyme.

Please look after yourself with the pup though. Make sure you put in boundaries and stick to them! I know you will fall under her spell. 

I’m not sure if you followed along yesterday. I have reached out for help and I’ve been honest about everything, including stopping meds. Last night I wasn’t sure if I was going to work, going to the ED or getting locked up. 

I agreed to take prn tonight. I did and have just realised it’s out of date. Probably should have checked that first. I don’t think my CM realises how hard it is to take meds with care. I can’t get more prn as I don't see my GP for another 3 weeks. I’m not sure if he can write the script though or I need my Pdoc. 

[tyme]

Yeah, makes sense @Captain24 .

I was only allowed 3 PRN per fortnight at one point. I had to use them wisely.

Yes! I've escaped to my place already. That's enough dog for now. But I have to say, it is cute. 

My niece has called it Ruby-Rose because it is a Ruby red colour. And they share the middle name Rose.

We were supposed to go camping in a few months so we have to see what we can do with the dog - whether she can come.

Argh... joys of pets.

[Captain24]

That’s a cute name. @tyme. 

Thats the hard thing with pets. Knowing where you can take them. Going to hospital was the first time I had left Pix. The longest she had been away from us was one night at the vet after her knee surgery. You soon learn that they can go most places though. I find taking them on trips from a young age helps with them being comfortable with it. Pix was 12 weeks when she had her first holiday! 

I don’t have a limit on my prn but I’m not to rely on them. Sometimes I can go a couple of months without them. My Pdoc at the hospital doesn’t want me on these ones at all. But I need to get through this mess first. 

I really need it to not be the weekend. I’m not sure I can make it on my own. 

[tyme]

Red flag weekends are common @Captain24 . For me in the past too.

If you look at all my hospital admissions, they are on Friday nights because i didn't want to face the weekend.

What do you think you could do differently tomorrow and Sunday to help you get through? Do you want to go to emergency and speak to someone? Do you want to take yourself and your furbabies for brekkie? Do you want to take yourself for a drive? A walk along the beach?

I'd encourage you to see what you can do differently this time.

[Captain24]

I have mums dog for a couple of hours both days @tyme. It’s meant to be raining all week end so that’s hard too. I have to try and mow mum and dad’s lawn at some stage. 

I did say earlier that I have Lego and diamond art but I’m not overly keen on them at the moment. Its the whole complete loss of interest in anything. 

I need to find some stuff for myself. 

My CM is referring me to a psychosocial something… apparently she feels like I need it. 

Things are getting really shaky.