I can’t cope

[Bow]

I’m the same @Captain24  showering is an effort for me. Even though once in it’s refreshing and warm and nice. I’m ashamed to admit that I washed my hair for the first time in 4 weeks this week. 😩

[Snowie]

Good morning @Captain24 

Just coming past to see how you are doing. I struggle a lot with showering too. I really think it is a part of our MI.

Talk soon 💌💌

[Captain24]

Good morning @Bow @Snowie 

Ive been to the markets this morning and Im stupid enough to agree to walk the dogs this afternoon with my parents. It’s a once off! 

OMG did I get ridiculed for that comment. That’s was unhygienic, it was dirty, I should be disgusted! It’s a MH site. I did have a lot of comments that people are the same. But it is what it is. I get the hair washing @Bow. It’s a hard enough effort to get into the shower let alone having to do your hair too! 

How is everyone’s Sunday going? 

[Bow]

Market sounds nice @Captain24  like fresh produce type market? Or bits and pieces? 

our market yesterday is all sorts of stuff. Lots of hand made and home grown. Yummy good to eat. But it was sooooo muddy yesterday. Everyone usually parks in a field at the back of the school (the markets are on the ground of a country school). They had to close to field parking first thing in the morning, but I after I had already parked. Everyone else had to park in the streets. People were parking for miles and having to walk.  And then they did ‘bump out’ (which is the term they use for coming in and packing everything back into your car) different. It’s usually a free for all and so chaotic cause people just wanna get out and get home! But your not allowed to bring your car in until your fully packed down. But yesterday they did it row by row, so took longer. Anyways my rambling! 

my hesitation in washing my hair is cause so much of my hair is falling out. And it’s distressing. I brush it, clumps come

out. I wash it, clump out. I use a little bit of dry shampoo. I don’t know it’s it all just part of aging…. Or from my ED 😩😩 I use to have such think luscious hair. Not anymore

guys are here pulling the cubby apart at the moment. I’ve vacuumed. Cleaned my desk. Been on the treadmill. 

[Captain24]

It’s called the Makers Market @Bow. It probably has about 20 stalls. Mostly hand made relishes, wines, craft beers, hand made sweets, some art and goat soap and wood work.

The main reason I go is that there is a guy who does his own dog treats. He has bones and all sorts of stuff. Last time I spent $50 and got a bag full. It’s all straight from the animal just dehydrated so it’s got no preservatives or anything. My dogs love anything from there. 

Yeah I get ‘bump out’ you do it at the Royal East Show when you are getting the goats out. 

It could be the ED. My hairdresser has said that some medications can cause it and extreme stress. So she thinks that being really mentally unwell could cause it. Also age! I know mine was falling out heaps but I had a med change and it settled down and even grew back. We are back to having to thin it out. 

Hopefully they will have finished pulling it down soon and then you can have your yard back and no more watching! 

[Captain24]

The cutest thing has just happened. Jett is still locked in a pen and isn’t allowed out. Pix was just trying to get him to play. Obviously he can’t but Pix does like him! 

[Captain24]

I’m feeling a little deflated. 

There was something I was interested in but looking through things, I’ve realised that others that are better than me are also interested. 

[Captain24]

Just sitting here contemplating life. I try to be a good person but I don’t think I am. I’m tired of never being enough. Tired of being forgotten. 

[Captain24]

Right now I feel like I’m nothing. 

Im not worth anything.

[Captain24]

A childhood memory was unblocked. I probably deserved what happened. I was probably being naughty. I’ve been told how bad of a child I was.